A lot of people shy away from hard conversations for various reasons. But those conversations are exactly the kind of conversations you need in order for growth to happen.

Good news! Handling difficult conversations is a muscle that you can build. The more you practice it, the easier and the more natural it flows over time.

In this conversation, Kayla Slice and Steve Ciprani of Ciprani Consulting walk us through difficult conversations. Learn some actionable steps to preparing and managing those types of conversations as well as some pitfalls to avoid.

Here are some power takeaways from today’s conversation:

  • What ghosting means and why it’s happening
  • How to prepare for difficult conversations
  • The three types of conversation that happen inside you
  • Approaching the conversation with empathy, humility, and curiosity
  • Tips for managing the conversation
  • Some pitfalls to avoid
  • The importance of a follow-through

Episode Highlights:

[08:19] How to Prepare for Difficult Conversations

Based on the book Difficult Conversations, there are three conversations happening to you within every conversation you’re having.

1. The ‘what happened’ conversation – It refers to what actually happened, and your perception of it becomes your assumption about it.

2. The emotional conversation – How you feel about it is different than what actually happened.

3. The identity conversation – What does it mean to you?

The first step toward getting honest about it is thinking through your lens and your perception of what’s going on with you, before you charge ahead and talk to someone else. Then approach it with empathy, humility, and curiosity. When you can do the idea exploration together, it just becomes less overwhelming and less daunting.

[20:00] How to Manage Difficult Conversations

Communication is two ways. It’s the sending of a message and the receiving of a message. Figure out how to make sure that your message is getting received the way that the person likes to receive the message.

Enforce an “expectations conversation” where you commit to doing your best to come to terms and communicate before the business relationship starts.

If there are things that you’re holding on to that are interfering with the relationship, they’re going to come out one way or another. So they might as well come out in an authentic way.

Work within someone else’s story and let them work within your story and hold those in tandem. Just be present and hear what they’re feeling.

Don’t be afraid to be vulnerable. Embrace your emotional state. Don’t run from it and come from authenticity because people can see through it.

Resources Mentioned:

http://www.cipraniconsulting.com

Email [email protected] or [email protected]

LinkedIn: ​​https://www.linkedin.com/company/ciprani-consulting

Books:

Difficult Conversations: How to Discuss What Matters Most

Emotional Intelligence by Daniel Goleman

The Hard Thing About Hard Things by Ben Horowitz